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...So here I am sitting at a bench in a mocha house at fisherman’s wharf...I have had some profound thoughts... or at least to me they where
Take this poem if I can remember it.
Evergreen nestled on a hill.
Surrounded by buildings,
Surrounded by snow,
But evergreen still.
I find wireless networks here....pay as you go how weird is that....they all ready have a corner on the market for internet here....all pay as you go....ahh well they cant charge me to use my computer....this internal dialog is getting stronger in me...I see something and I have an opinion about it....not a firm one but there is an opinion.
..Hmm maybe I need to walk some more
Need a better place to sit then this. Moving on...to the next place...let’s see how much walking I can do today…
The break water is such an awesome sight when the waves are rolling in. the way they crash and send water flying everywhere...but somehow I walk through them knowing on my mind that they will not touch me...I stand in the shelter from the wind at the end and just sit and watch the waves roll by....what an awesome sight....how much power in such a benign appearance.....after the last couple weeks I have a far greater appreciation for waves....well the man says that is ten to twelve...time for lunch. What a beautifully cold day....like the feeling after saying something hurtful so someone you love....maybe even colder than that.
“I’ll have the new England clam chowder” he said over the hum of the wind....it was a cold day....a cold winters day. It had snowed the day before and people where weary of gonig out in the snow...heck this is Victoria it does not snow here. But yesterday it did. And did it ever snow...leaving a mess of slush and ice behind. I notice a dent in a car as I see another car sliding in the parking lot. All the while I am hearing the people behind me talking about the issues of today and tomorrow. Hot air ballooning and Cadillac escalades. Of hopes and dreams....why write about them they sound old and dead...but I am feeling old and dead myself these days...I need a reason to keep going. Even if it is just to go for a walk. The Pilot Boat has powered up...no doubt to leave a pilot in the wheel house of some transport ship entering the straight....I am getting a chill now...but it was a good sandwich...maybe I should have tried the clam chowder too.....maybe next time.
On my walk continued. I walked sown Dallas road to cook st....the whole scene was just magic...everywhere I looked I saw things. I have seen them before but this time it was different for some reason...I walked past the place I took Amy all those years ago. I remembered us sitting on my sleeping bag drinking hot tea and looking up at the stars. We talked about things and life and what we wanted...that makes me feel warm again. Some things you can take with you and remember that it was not always so bad. I walked past all that and it was almost like saying good bye to the past I had lived there...not to the area but the emotions attached to it....I think I will walk that path again some day but not for a while. I remembered walking, make that trying to jog with Melanie past the Vic to Maui starting line and I walked that path many times on my own while I was living on Thurlow st. with Kirby. I thought about a lot of things today but most of them had faded by the time I was back in town. I logged on to the internet at serious coffee after buying a “Wi-Fi” detector that I probably could not afford. But I own it now anyway. Now I sit here on my bed listening to some sweet blues and relaxing before I have to go back to bed for work tonight. I have to decide some things regarding this band....Now. I can’t let them keep thinking that I am going to be here to play with them. I can’t live like this forever. It is kind of relaxing but there is no direction here for me....Nothing I want to strive for....
I can see the attraction Tree has for her blog. I am writing things and my thoughts are easier to understand after a while of writing about them...I do need a digital camera though...My 35mm is a good camera and all. But I don’t use it enough. I can sell it and buy a digital cam...see where that gets me. It was a long walk today. And I didn’t spend my day on the couch...that always makes me feel good about my day...I still wish there was something constructive I could have done with it today too.
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